Playdates and tough questions

My daughter wanted to have a playdate with one of the girls in her class so I called her Mother and, in the process, I learned a great lesson. She said, “I don’t want to offend you, but I have several questions for you before my daughter can come to your house.” Needless to say I was intrigued. I said ask away…
1. Do you keep a gun in your house? No.
2. Do you have any dogs? Yes, but a small dachshund.
3. Does your dog bite? No.
4. Do you have a pool or water? Yes.
5. Are you or another adult going to supervise the children at all times around the water? Yes.

I loved it!! I thought they were great questions and I was thrilled that I could ask the woman the same questions before Charlotte visits her house. I thought she was strong and powerful like a Mother bear protecting her cubs and I vowed to try to emulate her before setting up our next playdate.

I feel like I am a coward. Instead of asking tough questions, I just never let Charlotte go to other kid’s houses when I don’t know the parents. Questions wouldn’t be polite. My instinct is to slink away and not face up to what I truly want to know. Sadly, my new heroine said that some parents get furious when she asks her questions, telling her it is none of her business and to forget the playdate.

It makes me wonder. Would there be fewer problems in the world if everyone would just ask the tough questions right away?
1. Do you love me?
2. Did you sleep with her/him?
3. Were there really any weapons of mass destruction?
4. Are you pro-choice or pro-life?
5. Coke or Pepsi?
6. Paper or Plastic?

Comments

My kids are just now getting old enough for play dates. I hope I'm brave enough to ask the tough questions. My girlfriend has a 13 year old daughter, she gets a lot of grief when she questions the parents before a sleepover.

In our area meth is to popular not to be cautious.

I always put my babysitters through a bunch of questions and still ended up with a registered sex offender in my house(invited by the babysitter).

I say keep asking the tough questions, my kids are worth it.

OMGosh Sherry what a horrible babysitter your got stuck with, that is so irresponsible! I'm 19 and I've babysat tons of kids (when I'm not working) I'm great with them because I love kids there AWSOME! I remember once time in paticular there was a christmas party and I ended up watching 12 kids! (ages 6 months -12 yrs) I thought it would be a nightmare but we had fun but I can't believe the babysitter would invite someone over without your permission let alone a convicted sex offender. It's people like that that give good babysitters like me a bad name not to mention raise the fact that questions NEED to be asked.

P.s. If anyone needs a good baby sitter WITH refrences in orlando I'm free on weekends!

My mom used to be the same way, she wouldn't allow me to go over to anyone's house unless she knew the parents. If I was invited over for a birthday party, she would walk me up to the door and ask to meet the parents, and would talk to them and ask similar questions. It's not an easy thing to do, and at the time I thought it was kind of embarassing, but now that I'm older I realize that she was looking after me.

And yes, the world would have fewer problems if the tough questions were asked right away.

By the way, great post. It reminded me of what else I'm grateful for ^_~

I also think it is very important to ask your children questions..."How was your time?--What did you do/see?--Who was there? Make it seem like a nice conversation and they will tell you all about it....

Another question that should be added is "Do you keep alcohol in your house? -- Is it in a place where my child could access it?" Even if you drink at home you never know what another parent allows their children to do....a sip of beer to "see what it tastes like" can go too far.

There are way too many kids who are starting to drink under the age of 10.

How about:

Do you really support our troops?

Do you really want them to succeed?